The Myth of Feeling

Many people believe that the feeling is something that should dictate their actions and decisions in life. For example, if you feel left out, you judge your friend’s behavior. If you feel alone in your relationship, you blame your partner. If you feel jealous, you complain to your colleague. If you feel bored, you would go shopping or do something else.

We have been conditioned that our feelings are a result of things happened in the environment and that we need to control and manipulate the events to make us feel better about ourselves.

But what if what we learned about our feelings from the environment doesn’t serve us? What if the responsibility to process our feelings lay solely in our hands?

It is not easy to be a human. It is not simple to experience the ups and downs of our feelings.

The other myth we learned from our surrounding is the idea to surpress our feelings and ignore them. Especially the feeling of sadness, sarrow, anger and grieve. The idea of tough love. Be strong. Don’t show your feelings. Your feelings is a weakness. Or the idea of ignoring the pain. Numbing it either by drugs, food, binge watch movies, shopping or people pleasing.

All these myths send us a message that our feelings don’t matter. That our feelings are there to be surpressed, ignored or used to make an immediate decision.

But what is the truth about processing our feelings? Feelings of shame, guilt, sarrow, saddness, anger and frustration. What about those feelings? Why do they really exist? What is the lesson that we need to learn from processing our feelings? Are we giving our feelings a big deal that blinds us from understanding the situation as it is? Are we being dramatic with our feelings? Or maybe the feelings are there to guide us and show us the way and light?

Asking these questions regularly can help us to look at our feelings objectively without over-reacting towards them.