How to be a good parent?

We all want the best for our kids. The best upbringing. The best lifestyle. The best education. The best schools and colleges. We think we know better then them. We think we know what is best for them.

We fear they get into trouble. We worry they get bullied in schools. We want them to be happy and comfortable all the time.

Being realistic is necessary here. Are we going to be with our kids forever? What is it they really need to grow and flourish? How can we balance between loving them and allowing them to experience life in their space and time?

Sometimes I drive to work and think: What if this happened to my son? What if my daughter is struggling in school? Then I realize that our kids are not things we own. They are humans who have been put on this earth to experience life in all its ups and downs. We can’t stop the negative experiences from happening in their lives. But we can support them, hold them and be there for them when they need us.

The most difficult role is to be a parent. To be a good parent, an efficient parent shouldn’t be a goal for us to achieve. It needs to be a continuous reflective process where we learn best about our beliefs and actions through the immediate feedback we get from our kids. This requires a lot of patience and stillness. But the result is amazing when you see your child understands life, processes feelings maturely and become the individuals they always wanted to be. Not for us but for themselves.