Thinking what others think of you?
We live in a time zone you see people use the multi-thinking perspective. They think of themselves and think what others think of them.
On and on the mental cycle keeps going in different areas like family, relationships, education, career, money, appearance, parenting and other areas too.
But what triggers this mental habit? Is it trying to be perfect? Is it the fear of being rejected and abandoned? Is it trying to fit in the masses? Or is it just holding on to old values and perspectives that were never revisited and checked?
Personally I see this habit as an addiction. It is not just shopping addiction, workaholism or drugs or alcohol. Even the mental habits we have are addictions that start from childhood foundations and the environments we live in.
When you are addicted to thinking what others think of you, that could mean one or more of the following points:
1- You never got approval when you were a child and it is a way to fill that childhood wound.
2- You lived in an environment where things had to be perfect and you were the focus of attention.
3- You lived with people who were cautious of other people thoughts and you saw that, picked it up and made it apart of your identity.
4- Because of your childhood wound, it became satisfying to seek approval from others and it is not that simple to stop.
This post is not to blame or judge you for thinking what others think of you. But it is to encourage you to reflect on this mental habit. Our mental habits are not fixed. They can be modified and adjusted if you realize they don’t serve you today.
At the end your mind is yours only. Others’ minds are theirs only. Your thoughts are yours only. Others’ thoughts are theirs only. There is no way in the middle if you think you can bring your thoughts and others’ thoughts together. That act would take away your individuality and uniqueness. Remember you are unique, an individual human being and one of a kind. If you remember your separate individuality, you would eventually realize the preciousness of your thoughts and feelings and they are not meant to be manipulated or shaped to fit anyone else’s.