From self-cautious to self-free!
Self-cautious is really you paying extra attention to yourself, your actions, behaviours, words, appearance and whatever you do. Although it makes you aware and careful of the things you do but at times if it was used excessively, it can lock you and make you freezed in your mental box.
Self-cautious is where you also pay extra importance to yourself. You think you are special and you have got to be protected and safe no matter what. For example, when you are with people, you are extra careful of what you say and do. You think a lot before you talk. You get nervous and worried. Then you blame yourself: What did I say? Why did I say that? I shouldn’t have said that. And on and on the mental cycle keeps going.
One of the books that shifted my focus and expanded my life outlook is: The power of now by Ekhart Tolle. In this book you get to know the life presence we are missing when we think a lot. Also you learn about your mind tricks and chains. We think the mind protects us. But not necessarily all the time. Many times it keeps us behind and blind from the truth that is available there in front of us.
So you maybe wondering: How can I transform from self-cautious to self-free? Well self-free doesn’t mean you go out there and do whatever your mind tells you. It means being free from the overthinking, worrying, obsessing and repeating the same thoughts again. It means to observe yourself, your thoughts, feelings and actions objectively from a distance to finally be able to live your life freely, peacefully and fully.
The first tip I personally recommend is learn about your mind. What your mind is doing? Remember your mind was given to you for a purpose. It is not necessarily you. It is a tool and it depends on you how you decide to use it. There are many books about the mind like Joe Dispenza books and Jim Kwik. You can find other books too online.
From a very young age, you saw yourself going with the life flow, started school, went to college and started working and having your family. But then you realized later no body told you about your mind. How it works? How you need to deal with it? What are its tricks and manipulations? And what you can do? This is something you learn on your own.
Second tip is journaling. Write down your thoughts and feelings in your note book. Just write the first thing that comes in your mind without judging. Then read what you wrote and think for yourself: Does this make any sense? What is really going on here? What is happening? Doing this process regularly would show you how your mind works, whether your mind is controlling you or it is you controlling your mind. Also you get to know your hidden potential, whether you are just hiding behind the safety trick of your mind or you direct your mind where you want to go and what you want to achieve in life.
Third is spend more time outside in nature. Have regular walks in your neighbourhood. Sit on the beach and watch the sea waves, the sky, the birds and feel the fresh breeze touching your skin. Spend some time in a playground and watch the trees, green grass, people walking and chatting and children playing and running. This would tell you a lot about life, how to live fully, how to breath, how to be there present and appreciate the liveliness and fullness of life that is residing in you. That is something we tend to forget when we dwell in our worries, tensions and overthinking. But when you catch yourself worried and stressed just go outside and sit there for sometime.
It is amazing when you start learning about your mind. It expands your perspectives and encourages you to think differently. Probably it first you would get shaky and not stable. Maybe you become even shocked and traumatized. Don’t worry. This is normal. Take your time learning and processing. This process is a lifetime process. It is not like what we have been taught in schools and colleges, attend a study program, complete it and get a certificate. There is no certificate here. But there is the self-growth and transformation that comes gradually with consistent practice and patience.